After the crap storm that was my life last week, the title says it all. I have a lot of emotions that I don’t know what to do with. I’m having random, chaotic mood swings almost every day.
Suffice to say, weight loss and health have pretty much taken a back burner in life. When i found out my crap news, that my pregnancy had spontaneously ended, I bought Oreo’s. After my appointment my MIL stopped at the local grocery. I wandered in in a state of shock and horror. Wandering the aisles, I kept telling myself I didn’t need anything here. I ended up grabbing a container or Oreo’s and I barely contained my odd need to crack them open immediately. With the exception of the handful I shared, I ate an entire thing of cookies in 3 days. Poof, gone.
It hasn’t gotten better. I’ve eaten anything that crosses my path. I ordered a yummy salad on Saturday for a late lunch and brought the rest home for dinner. I ended up tossing together some pasta as well, then some cheesy sauce. You can see where this is going. I have slid feet first into a downward spiral of emotional binge eating.
I find it ironic that during my pregnancy all I could do was lose weight. I’d eat what they directed and I’d lose a half lb a week. I’ve still been following the guidelines I set for myself, as well as some tips I received for post care.
I gained 5 lbs in less than a week. FIVE. HOLY SHIT.
I don’t know why I’m surprised. I’ve had non-stop eating all day. I’ve indulged in pop, crackers, pasta and sugary items. I need help.
So, guys, I promise I’m going to work on getting my shit together. I still haven’t gotten my emotions under control, but I’;m working on it. I’m trying to squash the impulsive monster that lives inside me. It takes time, and that’s what I need right now. Time.
I can even say, I’m open to advice at this point. Whatever you have.